Not My Child! Monday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! Except this week...it's Not My Child! Monday!!  This blog carnival was created by MckMama, where everyone has fun telling all the things they did not (but really did) do over the past week. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

I recently came across this blog and find it so uplifting and inspirational and I LOVED her idea for Not Me! Monday, so here I am joining in on the fun. Check out what I my children did not do this week!

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My child does not like to pee outside.  He never pulls down his pants in the middle of our back yard, and aims on whatever fun object might be closest.  And he has certainly NEVER stood at the top of our slide and peed straight down it!!  Not my child!

My child did not call his adult male Awana teacher "God" for the better part of the year.  Nope, not my child.

My baby is not a messy eater.  He would never eat with his hands, he always uses a fork, correctly!  And, if he did eat with his hands, he certainly would not run those messy hands through his hair.  And...he definitely would not throw food on the floor deliberately, when he is finished eating.  Not my child!

My child did not try to help me clean the toilet, before flushing!!!

My child did not hide-out with my nail polish, and in an attempt to paint his toes, end up spilling an entire bottle of nail polish on his legs...while sitting on my bed!  Definitely not my child.

Hmmm...someone should really be watching that child!!